30 Jul

The illusory trickery of control


Do you ever get satisfaction from being able to proclaim, “I have things under control”? I know I do. I’ve got this. I have a plan. I have a handle on things, and people, I’m telling you, it’s all good!

Over the years, countless books, seminars, workshops, training sessions, and the like illuminated my path to comprehensive to-do lists, time management wisdom, and other ways of controlling my life. I told you, I got this! At least that’s what I thought. Until it became clear to me that control is nothing but an illusion.

It tricks us because on the surface, controlling seems to bring desirable outcomes. But these are seldom lasting and often not what we need.

It is true that goals and plans have tremendous merit. As Deepak Chopra often states, attention energizes, intention transforms, and the overlap between plans and goals and attention and intention is obvious. But the minute we stop paying attention to what is and solely focus on our plans, we often lose sight of what is presented to us and fail to see opportunities.

One thing I know for sure — we cannot control people. Nor should we. We can endeavor to influence, guide, coach, and suggest solutions for others, but under no circumstances can we control others and expect positive outcomes.

Let me leave you on an encouraging note, my productive and focused friends, as there is someone you can control — yourself.



  1. October 17, 2020

    Excellent article. I will be dealing with many of these issues as well..


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